First, Love Without Boundaries has a wonderful, wonderful blog series called "Realistic Expectations." This entire series is so thoughtfully written and useful to parents. Some of it may not pertain to each individual child, but it is a worthwhile read. It helps put in perspective some of the cultural differences that are faced in Chinese adoption, as well as ways that we can love our kids well by respecting their culture and their past. I recommend that whole series.
Love Without Boundaries - Realistic Expectations: Clothing
Every child handles this day differently, of course, but just remind yourself before you walk into the building to meet him or her for the first time that your child is about to lose everything they have known. The only concrete and material thing from her past life could very well be the clothing on her back or the shoes upon his feet. Watch their cues carefully on how important those items might be to them. If having to snuggle your new child in a stinky sweater is all that your child asks of you in those first few days together, then just take a deep breath and give thanks.Love Without Boundaries - Realistic Expectations: Child Preparation
Remind yourself that you had a really long time to prepare your heart and mind for this adoption, and chances are you had your own moments of pure panic along the way. Your child certainly deserves at least as long to process and come to terms with the possibly brand new concept of “adoption.” As mentioned above, the orphanage or foster parents might have had their own reasons for wondering if you were actually going to step through that government door as well.No Hands But Ours - The Best Mama
I can’t even begin to compare myself with the mothers who loved Cora so sacrificially. I often say that adopting Cora was the most selfish thing I’ve ever done. We pursued her adoption for no other reason than simply loving her and wanting her. Our motive was not to “help” her, but to fill a void in our hearts that only she could fill. And we have been so incredibly blessed by the sweet little firecracker who finds new and creative ways to turn our world upside down on a daily basis. Yet…by a sovereign act of God’s grace I’m not only Cora’s third mama, but her forever mama.And on my nightstand:
The Connected Child by Karyn Purvis
Toddler Adoption: The Weaver's Craft by Mary Hopkins-Best
These are just a few of the things I have read that have been extremely helpful in shaping me as I prepare for Ella to come home. Anything exciting you have read? Any recommendations?
